Mingle Until Departure

You already know where this is going...

I just received a call from a man named Chris at Verizon Wireless. He was kindly informing me that because my account is overdue (true) my service was about to be interrupted (plausible). He asked me if I wanted to pay right now and I said yes, knowing that if my only phone line went down I'd be in a minor pinch. As I was about to read off my Visa number, a little Dear Abbey voice went off in my head. The conversation then went like this:

"Can I pay online?"
"That'll take a day and a half."
"Can I call Verizon Wireless myself? What number can I call to make a payment?"
[click] My phone blinked 'Call Duration: 00:01:14'

Nice try, dickhead.

I went to my incoming calls list and dialed out to the number from which "Chris" had called. A kindly recording told me the number was not in service. Case closed. I think I really will write to Dear Abbey... or maybe McSweeney's.

Postscript: Chris really needs to work on his 'customer service phone voice.' It was scratchy and gargily and v. unprofessional.